Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Not knowing where to begin

   Really most times that I sit down to blog it's a post that has been running through my head all day.  Something that came up that I started thinking about and just had to share.  The last couple weeks though I haven't had any idea what to write about.  I do keep a list of things to write about, but none of them seemed "inspiring" to me.   I knew that if I sat down and started typing there would be something to say, but since I wasn't sure what I would have to say I did nothing.

   My "real" life is like that too.  I have a whole list of things I would like to get done, and I know if I just get started then something will get done.  But sometimes I am afraid that I won't have time to finish, so I would rather not start, and sometimes I am not sure how to tackle the task, so I do nothing instead.  And a lot of the time I am just not excited about doing it.   It doesn't make a lot of sense to me, because I know that making the effort feels good even if I get nothing accomplished (most of the time anyway). 

   Today there are no children in my house.  This rarely happens.  I did have grand plans today.  I had a few things to catch up on and then I was going to scrapbook.  However, it's 5:30 now and I have yet to get my scrapbook stuff out.   I needed to make another bath of homemade laundry detergent today and I did that.  And now I am blogging which I also wanted to stop neglecting.  But my scrapbooks didn't get brought out yet because I went out and dipped in the kid's wading pool and read a magazine.  Not productive at all, and I am glad we have a privacy fence as my neighbors would surely have gotten a laugh out of me sitting in the kids pool.  But, I was hot and I can never cool myself off in their pool when the kids are home, because I get splashed.  Not to mention who could read with kids running around outside?  Whenever I try that I almost always end up reading the same sentence over and over until I want to cry (and not only does that freak the kids out, but I also don't want them to think that I am the kind of mother who would rather read or do "my stuff" than watch them play and hang out with them).

   So, this what my summer has been like.  I have a list of goals and things I would like to do, but so far I don't feel like I've gotten anywhere and school starts SOON!  I am actually not really sure when I'm going to start school, but I do suddenly feel like time is running out on me.  And not knowing where to begin has really left me with not doing much of anything (now since I rarely get to do hardly anything that is it's own blessing I suppose). 

    So, my plan for the next month is to give myself specific tasks to do each day to get my goals done.  For example I have 2 boxes full of magazines that I need to go through.  I am using them for a craft for the preschoolers at church and I am cutting letters out of them, and pictures of children.  Doesn't seem like a big deal except that those magazines have been sitting in my basement since April.  I decided I am going to get rid of them this summer.  I decided that I would do at least 2 magazines a day.  Now, I still have 2 boxes sitting in my basement, but the piles in them are getting smaller.  So, if I do the same thing with scrapbooks and my other goals then I just might get somewhere.   So, for the next month I am going to make myself blog every day even if it's really short and dumb (wish I could think of a more creative word than that).  Please feel free to skip the dumb posts.  I am hoping by doing this not only will I get in a good habit of writing every day, but also of organizing my thoughts, becoming more concise, and getting some good ideas.  (When I am blogging I always seem to think of things I would like to write about). 

   So, here's to coming up with a place to begin, because a little something done every day can end up being a big thing.  Hoping big things (or at least accomplished goals) come out of me tackling my little projects one little step at a time.

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